Sunday, November 14, 2010

Solitary Confinement

Mischeif's challenge this week is to repost any blog you've written that you're most proud of, no matter the content, as a sort of honor to the Myspace blogging community (in light of recent chaos).

This was my first attempt at fiction writing, originally posted as a Blogophilia write in September 2008.

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Chelsea sat at her bedroom window looking wistfully outside at the street.  All of the neighborhood kids were there playing a game of street tag, all except her, that is.  She leaned her forehead against the glass and thought about how unfair life was.

She glanced at the clock; how much longer did she have to stay in here?  That morning Chelsea had opened the door to her mother's bedroom and saw her and her boyfriend, Eddie, naked on the bed.  Eddie screamed at her mother to "get that brat out of here, now!"  Her mother jumped up, threw on a tattered bathrobe and grabbed Chelsea by the arm, dragging her back to her own bedroom.  "You're staying in solitary confinement until further notice, missy," she spat.  It was now 1:00 in the afternoon, and she had to pee.  She hated Eddie.

"Solitary Confinement" was one of Eddie's phrases.  He had been dating her mother for about 3 months now, but it seemed more like he was living with them since he was always around.  He shaved his head and had tattoos all over his arms, and even had one on his face that looked like a tear drop coming from his eye.  She wondered if that was something you had to get in prison, for one of Eddie's friends had a tear tattoo on his face as well and she knew they had been in prison together.  Eddie always smelled like beer and sweat.  Sometimes when Chelsea would walk past him, he'd laugh and pat her on the behind.  She tried not to walk past him very much.  

She looked at the clock again, 1:15.  She wondered if she should try and sneak out, but the floorboards in the hallway sqeaked so bad she knew she wouldn't get away with it.  She walked to the door, opened it a crack, and softly yelled, "Mom?  Can I come out now?  I really need to pee!"

No response came from her mother's bedroom, nor from the living room.  She held her breath and listened for any sound, any at all, but she couldn't hear anything except the faint wheeze of the window air conditioner.  Deciding to risk it, she shimmied down the hallway towards the bathroom as quickly and quietly as she could, floorboards squeaking and sqwaking with each step.
  
Once relieved, she wondered what she ought to do now, go back to her bedroom or sneak out to the kitchen to grab some food?  She was really hungry since she hadn't gotten to eat breakfast.  But, she was worried that she couldn't hear anyone in the house.  Surely her mother and Eddie wouldn't have left without telling her?  Of course, if they had it wouldn't really surprise her.  Her mother had been acting weird ever since Eddie had come into their lives.  

She tiptoed to her mother's bedroom door and listened.  Nothing.  She cracked it open, and saw her mother lying under the covers, asleep.  Eddie wasn't with her.  Chelsea breathed a sigh of relief.  Maybe he had gone out and wouldn't be back for a while.  She headed out to the kitchen with a grin on her face, thinking of Lucky Charms.  Rounding the corner, she stopped up short, the grin leaving her face.

Eddie was there, leaning over the kitchen table and sniffing something into his nose from a small mirror.  She had seen her mother doing that before; her mother had yelled at her that it was medicine and not to say another word about it.  Chelsea had wondered about that, but did as her mother said and didn't ask questions.  

He looked up at Chelsea, angry at first that she had interrupted him, but then a sleazy smile spread across his face.  He looked her up and down, eyes piercing through the thin fabric of her Cinderella nightgown.  Fine, that's just fine, he thought.  Need to cop me a feel of that.....

Chelsea jerked backwards as Eddie reached out to her.  As he got up from the table his arm knocked the mirror onto the floor, shattering it into pieces.  "Now look what you've done little girl, you made me break my mirror.  Know what happens to little girls that break mirrors?" he sneered.

"No," she whispered, eyes locked on his.  She was scared, her heart was hammering in her chest.  She wished her mother was awake.

"They get seven years of bad luck.  But I think I know a way to stop that from happening....wanna know how?"  He edged close enough to her that she could smell his bad breath.

"H-how?" she said, her voice starting to tremble.

His hand shot out and clamped down on her arm.  "If you give me just a little kiss, I think that'll stop it.....c'mere...."  Eddie pulled her closer to him.

In that split second, Chelsea rememered what her friend Gina from across the street told her to do if anyone bullied her:  she brought her knee up as hard as she could between his legs.  Startled and in pain, Eddie let go of her arm to grab himself and Chelsea ran to the front door and out into the street, screaming for help.

Officer Jeffries was parked down the block, giving the kids playing tag a warning to stay out of the street when he heard the scream.  He saw Chelsea dart out of the house, and saw Eddie lunging for her, shouting "Come back here you little bitch!" 

Officer Jeffries ran towards them, whipping his gun out of its holster at the same time.  Chelsea kept running, across the street to Gina's house where she banged on the door until Gina's mother let her in.  Chelsea collapsed in her arms, sobbing, as Gina peeked around them through the door and saw Eddie being arrested.

Later that night, some people came to drive Chelsea to her dad's house to stay.  Her mother had been arrested too.  Chelsea was tired from all that happened that day, so many people had her explain over and over again what Eddie had done.  They were also very interested in learning what the last three months had been like in her house with Eddie there.  Now she just wanted to eat something and go to sleep.  She hoped her dad wouldn't be angry with her about what happened.

She crawled into the backseat of the car, clutching her Mickey Mouse doll.  Gina and her mother were standing on the curb; Chelsea waved goodbye to them through the rear window as the car pulled off into the night.

Writing Challenge

My friend DawnMarie  started this Writers Challenge group on Facebook and this is my post from that.

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Okay here goes this weeks challenge for 11/14- 11/20 ~ Good luck, have fun and here is the challenge ...

1) write something funny about yourself !!!or/ plus (either or both is fine)here is the challenge~2) take these three words ~ "blue~sunrise~scent" and make them your own in 50 words or less

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Getting a start on the day

before distractions set in

as they inevitably do.

Doing yardwork at sunrise

when everything is still.....serene.

Mow, rake, sweep....sweat.

The sky turns from rose pink to blue

as the hours pass.

The scents of autumn surround me

and all is right with the world.


Friday, November 12, 2010

We Gotta Stick Together, Bloggers!

Originally posted on Myspace Nov. 12, 2010:

Myspace......Myspazz......Myshit......

MySPACE is no longer MY space.  With all of the changes they've made, it's become so UN-user-friendly to us bloggers.  With 3.0 comes the death knell to Blogging As We Know It.
Last week when I got "3.0'd" as Karen so eloquently and accureately puts it, I was Freaking Out.  Freaking Out, because this little ol' community here in cyberspace has become such an important and integral part of my life and I could see it all slipping away, and right at a very difficult time.  I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my life that I smashed up AGAIN a few months ago and that's hard enough....I DO NOT NEED THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW, MY-FUCKING-SPACE.

After frantically copying and pasting all of my past blogs that I wanted to keep to a Word document saved to my computer, I relaxed a tiny bit.  At least those pieces of me purging my soul won't be lost to the My[Fuckers].  And those awesome, patient saints such as Marian, Barbara K. and C.C. have kept up such a positive, accepting attitude throughout all of this change that I was calmed a little.  Maybe, just maybe, everything will be OK.

Well.  The thing is, so many people have already left and won't be returning.  Even if things settle down after they get out of Beta testing, the blogging community here won't ever return to what it once was.  The people who have already left or who are currently planning on leaving won't be enticed back, I'm afraid.

And what of the people that remain?  Will they be content having their circle become even smaller?  What will happen to BFF and Blogophilia?  Darlene at BFF is already searching for alternative blogging sites to permanently move to.  I have not heard about our fearless leader of Blogophilia, Marvin, on any alternate plans. 

The thing is, there are tons of blogging sites out there.....and that's great!  MySpace was never a true blogging site, it was a social network that happened to have a blogging feature, almost tacked on like an afterthought.  But it seems no one can agree on which blogging site would be best to move to.  So we have people throwing up duplicate blogs all over the place on Blogger, Wordpress, etc, just in case.  Everyone is becoming scattered.  And some people have just left without even telling any of their friends and readers where they're at now.

I know we all want to stick together......well, at least I do.  I guess I can't speak for the rest of you, but I would really hate it if Blogging As I Know It comes to an end.  I may not write about sunshine and rainbows all the time but I really value your feedback and support and encouragement.  And, the occasional kick in the ass when I need it.  I know I have a lot of lurkers who read but don't comment....I can only hope that my words might have some value to you, maybe even help if you're struggling on the same path I am, and would want to continue to follow me down the yellow brick road. 

I feel like I'm rambling pointlessly now....I guess what I'm trying to get at is if you value this blogging community as much as I do, lets make sure to stick together through this change. 

--make sure you have a way to contact your friends/readers with an email address or Facebook add, something outside of Myspace.

--if you're on Facebook, a Myspace Bloggers group has been established for just this purpose, to catalogue everyone's new non-myspace blogs so we can keep track of each other.  Friend/message me on Facebook if you'd like the link.

--plan for the inevitable.....eventually, myspace blogging IS going to come to an end.  Even if you have no intention of leaving now, plan ahead.  Unless you're planning on just quitting blogging altogether once the end comes, that is.

--re:  planning.....if you haven't or don't already, if there are any of your past blogs that you want to keep, make sure you have a copy of it somewhere OFF of myspace, either saved to your computer or moved to another blog site.

--about blogging elsewhere.....really, it's not so bad out there.  We CAN establish a new blog community somewhere else and have it be as close knit as this one is, yes, really!  It'll require making some changes, but that's small potatoes considering the major changes we're going through right now. 

--lurkers, if you want to keep in touch at all, message me privately to share info if you want.  Or just follow me to my new site.

--here's my contact info again:

email:  clarkster68@aol.com

facebook:  Steven Clark

Blogger:  Steven's Rants


And, my friends, please just don't disappear without a word to anyone.  If you're quitting blogging altogether, fine....but please tell us. 

I fully expect that we'll lose touch with some people as a result of this, and that's sad, but inevitable.  But it doesn't have to be the end of things.....one chapter is closing, another one is opening.

See you on the other side......

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Alone

Alone

Watching life from the sidelines

Everyone laughing and smiling

Watching football games with mates

or having dinner with friends

Everyone putting on a mask

to hide their realities.

I learned about masks long ago

how it can save, protect, and make one

feel included in the masses.

But lately the mask has been torn

and it's getting harder to wear

Who am I trying to fool, and

Who am I trying to hide from?

Myself?  Or them?

Both.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Dreams: a Blogophilia and BFF Write

Dreams are elusive...

lost from the mind

upon awakening,

or lost in the wind

once spoken.

Recurring over and over

without any further

understanding of

what it's all about.

Day dreams,

night dreams,

dreams of the future,

dreams of the past...

why does no one dream of the present?

Ah, but we have,

and we will...

for the present is

yesterday's future

and tomorrow's past.

I would give anything for

the chance to stay in my dreams

and avoid the harsh realities

of cobbling my life

back together...

But this cobbler must awaken

before the harsh realities

of his dreams

overtake him.

 
Blogophilia 36.3 Topic:  I would do anything for...
Bonus Point (hard, 2 pts):  mention something lost in the wind
Bonus Point (easy, 1 pt):  include a cobbler
BFF Topic:  Recurring Dreams

Dreams - a Blogophilia and BFF Write







Dreams are elusive...

lost from the mind

upon awakening,

or lost in the wind

once spoken.

Recurring over and over

without any further

understanding of

what it's all about.

Day dreams,

night dreams,

dreams of the future,

dreams of the past...

why does no one dream of the present?

Ah, but we have,

and we will...

for the present is

yesterday's future

and tomorrow's past.

I would give anything for

the chance to stay in my dreams

and avoid the harsh realities

of cobbling my life

back together...

But this cobbler must awaken

before the harsh realities

of his dreams

overtake him.




Blogophilia 36.3:  I would do anything for....
Bonus Point (hard, 2 pts):  mention something lost in the wind
Bonus Point (easy, 1 pt):  include a cobbler

BFF:  Recurring Dreams

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Judge Not....

So I was at the store today, and standing in line at the checkout there was a mother with her toddler daughter in front of me.  The girl was probably about two or so, and was sitting in the shopping cart seat so she was facing me.  This little girl looked up at me and gave me the most beaming happy smile.....I couldn't help but grin back.  It was an innocent, heart warming moment.

Well.  At that moment her mother turned round and saw me smiling at her baby....she gave me a withering glare and moved in between us faster than you can say pedophile.....for that's obviously what her glare told me she thought of me.

I have to say, my feelings were hurt.  I know my exterior shouts "felon!" rather than "choirboy!" but what did she think I was going to do, follow them home and kidnap her?  Actually that's probably exactly what she thought. 

I have enough self-loathing going on lady without you adding to it.  Thanks.  I admit I've done a lot of bad, shitty, illegal things and made bad choices in my life....but I've owned up to them, taken responsibility, and am trying to lead a decent life.  When all is said and done I don't think I'm that bad of person despite my past.  Not everyone with a rough exterior is an axe murderer. 

Why are we so quick to judge others?  Is it programmed into us from birth or is it an innate animal instinct?  Maybe a little of both?  For as much as I was hurt that she judged me, I judged her right back:   You have no idea who I am or what my life is like, bitch, so fuck you. 

I'm just as guilty.

Another day in the life...